I was upstairs with the boys this morning hurridly getting everyone ready to go tour a fire station with the MOPS group.

Me: "Ben, whatcha doin'?"

Ben: "Going potty....on a piece of money." ("piece of money" being Ben-speak for "coin")

Me: "What?" I leave Eli on the floor and go investigate the situation. Sure enough, there is Ben sitting on the potty peeing on a penny that is in the toilet bowl.

Ben: "See it?"

Me: "Yes. Why did you put that penny in the potty?"

Ben: "To pee on it."

Me: "That's not really what money is for. Do you know we have to do now?"

Ben: "Flush it!" And he flushed the penny away....

This is why ...

I'm sure that every person has a list of things that they will NEVER do when they are a parent.

Some of these are probably reasonable like: I will not beat my child.

Some are out of your control and generally not reasonable like: I will not ever let my child throw a fit in the grocrey store.

Some of them are just born of ignorance: I will never have have more baby contraptions (swings, bouncers, seats, jumpers) in my living room than I have furniture. Sure you will, and if you hear about the NEXT BIG THING that promises to make your newborn sleep, you'll rush out to the store to bring that one home as well.

Here's a few of the things that were on my list:

I will not take my child out in public in pajamas.

     ***** This has been ammended to include the following clauses: unless they are sick and we have to go to the doctor and then to the pharmac ...

July 15.

Ben: Was driving a car along the edge of the table this morning and he sneezed hard enough to snap his head forward and hit his mouth on the table giving himself a bloody lip.

Eli: Was in our bed a little last night to "sleep". There was no sleeping, but he was hysterical. He was staring us down, and growling at us, and doing "lizard push ups" and trying to crawl, and inch-worming around, rolling over in between us, grabbing at us, kicking. He was totally showing off.

July 16.

Ben: I'm just going to shamelessly brag and say that he has such good manners. He's still certainly and obviously two years old, but really the child is mostly polite. Even when he's playing with his toys they say thank you, you're welcome, bless you, yes please, no thank you, etc to each other. It makes my ears happy. :)

Eli: He made it up into " ...

Elijah had his six month checkup today and follow up for his incurable diaper rash. Everything was going fine, at least as fine as taking two small children to the doctor when one of them should be sleeping and being stuck in a tiny room filled with things that two year olds aren't supposed to touch while waiting for 45 minutes for the nurse and then the doctor and then the nurse... Ugh.

I have to admit I find well-baby checks pretty stupid. I'm grateful for health insurance and I definitely believe in preventative care, but give me a break. Just give him the vaccine and let me go home. So the doctor comes in and she'd asking me medically stupid questions about his development, "does he turn his head toward noise?", "does he recognize family members?" etc. I'm answering those while trying to keep Eli from rolling off the exam table and Ben from pulling out the stirrups. I find these to be dumb, but at least I can justify them as being developmen ...

Just a tidbit for each day:

July 1.

Ben: (At the doctor's office to the doctor)  "I am waiting patiently, but I want to go home now."

July 4.

Ben: During his nightly prayers, "Thank you God for daddy take me to the store and buy some chocolate milk."

Eli: Has his first bottle of formula. Boo! Hiss!

July 5.

Ben: Very into putting things into his mouth and then "sneezing" them out. It's nasty and I think he first real forray into "boy humor"...

Eli: Eats and likes steamed and pureed broccoli.

July 6.

Ben: Saw his first in-theater movie, "Ice Age 3" with Mom ...

In honor of Elijah being an amazing six months old already (oooh, that made me a little tearful!) I'm going to list the six things that you should know about him.

1. Eli likes to eat. He nurses during the day every three to four hours and he screeches at the slightest interruption to his meals including when they end. He's been sampling homemade baby food in the evenings for a couple weeks now and is about ready to have food added to his breakfast as well. So far his favorite is bananas, followed by pears. He grudgingly ate carrots and applesauce. Sweet potatoes are up next.

2. Eli likes to chew. Andrew jokes that we should buy him puppy teething toys. He will gnaw on anything that he can get to his mouth. After months of not having to worry about little pieces of things I'm suddenly scanning the floor to make sure there's nothing that he can grab and put in his mouth that will hurt him. If he is having a "good chew&q ...

I made potato soup for dinner tonight. I don't need to use the recipe card anymore, but the official name of the recipe is: Potato Soup--Gram's Way. I washed the potatoes with one hand, the other arm around the baby on my hip. I did put Eli down briefly when it came to chopping the potatoes. Our knives are dull and I wasn't in the mood to slice through my finger. I'm squeamish about stitches. After the potatoes were in the pot though he was back up on my hip while we stirred and seasoned.

It just made me wonder how many generations of women in my family had made this recipe and stood cooking dinner with a baby on their hip. It was a nice homey thought that made me both happy for carrying on a family recipe and tradition and ridiculously homesick at the same time.

I'm sure my mom has cooked this potato soup recipe while holding one of us girls when we were small. There were four of us, after all, wonder woman she may be, but I think only the touch of our Lord co ...

Jamey: "Ben, what makes you happy?" (We talk about happy and sad a lot.)

Ben: "Jesus. And Daddy."

What he did not say, but was clearly inferred was, "Mom, you are chopped liver!"

Ben loves anything that we call "big". One day I was teasing him and I said, "Wow! Look at that big belly you have!" He stopped running around and looked down at his tummy and got a huge smile on his face and said, "Yeah! It IS big!" Now he routinely will stop during the day and ask us if he has a big belly and becomes very excited when we assure him that his belly is big. He's also learned how to stick it out so now he'll come up to us and pull his shirt up, slouch down and shove his stomach out while saying, "See how big my belly is?" He thinks it's great. Of course, the first time he tells someone *else* that ...

I have heard my all-time favorite radio commercial while living in California this time around. Favorite. Ever. It makes me laugh out loud and can turn my frown upside down...anyway, you get it, I like the commercial.

So, who is the marketing genius behind this commercial? Is it a cell-phone commerical that has a much better and less annoying jingle than "Can you hear me now?" A famous spokesperson with a slogan catchier than "Just Do It"?

It is none of those, in fact I would bet that this commerical sprung straight from the mind and the lips of the owner of this business. It's a mom and pop operation, no big think tanks necessary. They're just telling how about their family....shooting range. Seriously.

Every few months I guess in order to boost business they have a Family Fun Day at the shooting range. It seems like now would be a good time for a mother-in-law joke, but I LOVE my mother in law (Hi, Peggy ...

Yesterday when Ben was outside playing I found him eating dirt and with a "mud beard" from where he apparently didn't like dirt and spit it out. We just bought him a book that shows a little girl eating sand so I guess he thought he should try it out. Anyway. Today, I look out the back door and see a very dirty Ben with his fingers in his mouth.

Jamey says, "Don't eat dirt, honey."

Ben: "I'm not, mommy."

Jamey: "Okay, well, take your hand out of your mouth it's all dirty."

Ben: "Dirt is yucky." He takes his hand out of his mouth and looks at his finger. "Can you take this?"

Jamey: "What is it?"

Ben: "A booger. I was eating it."